How much more trust can a heart that has been hurt, that has experienced that nothing lasts, have at the end of it all?
So much to say, i figured i need a blog.
Always caught up with you, i almost forgot how blessed i am.Time passed so fast i barely remember anything. Called the wrong person. Met the wrong people. Said things i shouldn't have said, things i don't even tell my bestest friends, things i struggled to keep it all in. Then i realised, you're not affected. You're still the same, old you - the one i fell for, but i just shouldn't do this anymore. You're hurting me, I'm hurting myself.
You made me do the silliest things i thought i'd never do in my life and realised what a mess i can be. Everyone makes mistakes, but the mistakes i made, they were to much to bear. It haunts me, every night. Its not easy. I'd pray and pray and pray, but when the day breaks, i still feel empty, rather. Because i feel more for people than i should - I need to be selfish too.
"Earlier this afternoon, my emotional self was a wreck as I had left it last night. The peace I asked for had lasted me only after so long because I never went back to seeking it. Rather, I used the rest of the night to entertain my insecurities and the lack I had so foolishly led to take over me overflowed into today."
The only person i can ever relate to. I love you liling.
Things will get better, they always do. If its meant to be, it will be. If it doesn't, it's time to love myself a little more, too.
